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Poetry
By Ann Dawson
from
Sussex, England, UK
e-mail: anngd@anngd.co.uk
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T
he
ca
nd
l
e
.
Oh
warm and gentle
flickering light,
chasing the shadows
from the night
glimpses of softness
darting to and fro
across the walls,
to spread their glow.
Reassuring as
its gleaming guile,
slowly creeping,
the shadows revile.
Slowly, tardily,
diminish its height,
the flame and taper
continue their fight.
Throwing out flashes
of dancing rays,
as cowering darkness
around it plays.
Flame of life
and chastity,
pure and clean,
consolatory.
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THE
MONKFISH
The
Monkfish has great beauty
though appearance be not its charms,
A King amongst the waters deep
swims silently from all harm.
Ugly
to all, whose eyes are closed
to the sheer beauty of his form.
Open the vision of your mind and see
this wonderous creature transform.
So
open your eyes and see deeper,
beyond this outer shell
to the exquisite being that lies within,
on first impressions not to dwell.
Everything
in Nature has beauty,
though some may disagree,
For all is created to perfection
in the way it is meant to be.
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KIDS!!!
(who'd have 'em)
I
look about this house and see, such devastation
there,
How can three kids make such a mess, and leave it
with no care.
There's dried jelly on the carpet, there's cake
upon the light,
The walls look as if they've had a paint and crayon
fight.
There's
pizza in the bathroom and marmite in the tea
How does it get in such a mess, can YOU explain to
ME.
The toys have all exploded, bits sprayed all around
the floor,
kitchen chairs are now a den, my jacket, makes the
door.
The
bathroom ain't much better, the shampoo's near all
spent,
toothpaste drips out from the tube, I daren't
wonder where it went.
Towels thrown down upon the floor, dirty clothes
lay there in heaps,
I've just espied my make-up bag, haven't seen it
now for weeks.
The
same story is in the bedrooms, clothes both dirty
and clean,
dropped and left all o'er the deck where a carpet
once was seen.
Chests of drawers gape open, empty drawers lay on
the floor,
Will they ever begin to understand what these
useful things are for.
A
lesson I'll have to teach them, I'll take
everything away,
no clothes will they have to wear, no toys with
which to play.
My mind is set upon this plan, to the rules they
will be bound,
no more havoc or chaos, shall within this house be
found.
So,
now, plucking up the courage, to relate this to my
young,
struggling over mounds of junk, the words hanging
on my tongue.
I've got to tell them straight away, so that first
thing in the morn.
they can put this room to rights, this disorder
then to scorn.
With
the anger raging within me, off up the stairs I
tread,
beyond the door I see them, sleeping peacefully in
their beds.
These gentle little angels, three bundles of
heavenly delight,
no one in their rightful mind, could be cross with
them tonight.
So
while they're gently sleeping, I'll just clear the
lounge and stairs,
maybe do the kitchen and then the bicycle
repairs.
So I will leave it until tomorrow, to tell of my
design.
allowing sleep to take these cherubs,
these wonderful kids of mine.
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TILL
WE MEET AGAIN
The
day that I first met you,
there was something in your eyes
which held my full attention,
As if I had won first prize.
I
didn't know quite what it was,
that made my heart just melt,
but a pounding started in my chest,
and the strangest things I felt.
My
insides turned to jelly,
my head began to whirl,
butterflies tickled my tummy,
and my toes began to curl.
Your
voice was smooth as silk,
your hair shone in the sun,
your eyes sparkled like a diamond
when the polishing was done.
You
slipped your arms around my waist,
you whispered in my ear,
Those words will never leave me,
I still hear them loud and clear.
You
spoke of how you loved me,
you spoke such words of charm,
I knew that being close to you
would never do me harm.
But
that was many years ago,
how long I can't recall
Many hurdles we have seen go by,
now seem so very small.
I
stand here now and watch you lay
so cold and yet so still,
remembering all the things we did,
Our dreams, we did fulfill.
Our
life together was so good,
and now you have to go,
you have meant so much more to me
than you will ever know.
I
didn't have the chance last night
to say goodbye to you,
You slipped away so quietly,
you were gone before I knew.
But
one day soon my darling man,
we once again shall meet,
and I shall lay right by your side,
flowers blooming at our feet.
But
until that day when I can join
you lying there in peace,
The love we had shall still live on,
for that will never cease.
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SLEEP,
BABY, SLEEP
I
can feel you swell inside of me
your small and powerless form,
so dependent on the care i give,
to keep you from all harm.
Within
the womb's great haven
perfect peace and care abound,
my love engulfs your fragile soul
your being to surround
Oh,
small and tender life so pure
so gently you perform.
so helpless, warm and unaware
of life's forthcoming storm.
So
take your time, and gently sleep
and grow in love, secure,
Be safe while you develop there
far from this life impure.
For
one day soon, you will emerge
to face this world's disdain,
So rest awhile and gently sleep
your presence from here abstain.
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I
KNOW
Did
you think I wouldn't notice
the lipstick on your shirt,
Did her perfume spill upon the floor
where you thought it wouldn't hurt
Her
present to you of that watch
did you think I wouldn't see
did you really think you could pass it off
as the one that came from me.
Did
you think that all those late hours
that you came home at night
That I would fall for all your lies
did you really think I might.
The
tickets in your pockets
for the concerts and hotel
was I really supposed not to notice
how our bank balance fell.
That
earring on the carpet floor
we know it wasn't mine,
The soft kid glove lay in the car,
with stitching, oh so fine.
So
many things and tell tale signs
how careless can you be,
to just pretend I imagine things
or think that I don't see.
Are
you really just that thoughtless
or don't you care at all
You never used to be like that with me
as far as I recall.
What
has happened to you,
do you just not love me now,
Do I no longer excite you
Does it matter anyhow.
When
you come home tonight,
there will not be a sound,
the house will be so empty,
Because I won't be around.
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A
CHILD'S ILLNESS
She
lay so weak and poorly there,
barely her chest did rise and fall,
Her 'pock-marked' face, her tousled hair,
she lay so frail and small.
So
ill she lay, and I alone,
would hear her wimpering fight,
once more, troubled sleep she would find,
as I held her through the night.
As
dawn drew near, the sun did rise,
the sky brought forth the day,
my eyes, so dull, from watching her
little face, so pale and gray.
A
tiny flicker from her eyes,
her arms, twitched on the sheet,
her little voice so weakly cried
'Mummy... I want something to eat'.
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CHRISTMAS
TRAVELLER
Wonderous
eyes opened wide to stare
at the glittering spectacle before them there.
Shiny round baubles, tinsel so bright,
with twinkling lights shining into the
night.
Sparkling
and glistening for all their worth
such a beautiful sight upon this earth
The magic of Christmas hung in the air
catching the breath of ev'ry one there
Faces
held in awe at that wonderous sight
the bewitching horizon so festive and bright.
Packages large, and packages small
there's a parcel labelled for one and
all.
Joyous
greetings tripped from every tongue,
the spectre of Christmas had all but begun.
The table bearing such incredulous fare
undreamt delicacies, not a space left
bare.
As
the chattering and babbling of Christmas began
Jubilant sounds as the fiesta went to plan.
Happiness, through that glacial portal, I saw
nose squashed to the glass, I stayed there in
awe.
I
could barely drag my bulging eyes away,
wishing and praying, that there I could stay.
Such amazing beauty ne'er before had I seen,
none of them realize that there I had
been.
Slowly,
grudgingly, drawing away
that spectre of magic, in my mind was to stay.
I picked up my bundle, placed my bed in its
pack,
slouched off down the lane, ne'er to look
back.
For
the road is my home, my own lonely world,
frosted ditches and hills around me unfurled.
None will e'er know that I'd been there that
night
to share in that beautiful, wonderous
sight.
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As
I lay here in my bed, I dare not open my eyes,
I know they're out to get me, I know how hard they
try,
this devil's house fills me with fear, its risks so
clear to see,
how can I escape and save my soul, before they get
to me.
My
day is full of horror, to that kitchen I dare not
go,
lurking, skulking in the sink, they, on the
worktops grow.
Those dishes are out to catch me, they're hiding in
that place,
I know that they conceal themselves, ready to give
me chase.
As
I pass by the laundry room, that washer growls out
in glee,
I'm sure it's gonna get me soon, oh help, please
hear my plea.
It's twirling eye stares through that tomb, o'er
dirty mounds of clothes
whirring, whizzing its angry sounds, hot steam
through pipes it blows.
The
vacuum, slowly slithers out, from underneath the
stairs,
slowly, tardily, gathering speed, wrapping wire
around the chairs.
Dust clouds, belching from behind, it's angry roar
I hear,
coming closer, closer, closer still, I know it's
getting near.
Wherever
I hide, wherever I go, I can hear their furious
sound,
I can hear them calling around the house, their
menace does abound.
So hiding here beneath my sheets, this day I cannot
brave,
I know if I should e'er give in, I'll become a
household slave.
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ONE
DAY AT A TIME
I
have to take control again of this wretched life of
mine,
this sickness, here inside of me, made alcohol my
shrine.
One day at a time, is what it takes, to free me of
this fiend
and take me away from my life, that's now so
demeaned.
A
greater power, is out there, to take heed of my
plea,
and I offer myself unto His care, help return my
sanity.
Searching deep within myself, my soul's inventory
to find,
to fearlessly admit my faults, their morals to
remind.
But
one day at a time is what I'll take, to slowly
tread that path
onward to the next great step, to avert this
alcoholic wrath.
I admit to myself and all around, confess where
I've gone wrong
these faults that lie within me, no more do they
belong.
So,
one day at a time, as I trudge along that rocky
road,
I do my best to stay in line with this, my new
found code.
In time I will be ready to humbly ask and pray,
my shortcomings and my failures, ask Him to take
away.
Through
addiction to this evil, to many I have caused
pain,
and to them all, shall make amend, and vow ne'er to
do again.
But just one day at a time, I know, is all that I
can bear,
to make this day free from drink, I'll try, to
myself I swear.
I'll
keep on trying , oh so hard, and admit when I go
wrong,
from keeping to this narrow path, that will last my
whole life long.
I will pray for guidance from Him, and for His
strength to carry on,
to help me just one day at a time, from dawn until
it's gone.
So
as I travel along this road, my eyes open wider as
I go,
to others I'll pass this message, and to them I
will show.
how we all can help each other on that long and
uphill climb,
and taking life all so gently, taking, just one day
at a time.
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AIN'T
MEANT TO BE THIS WAY
Oh
No! he's coming home now,
what is there left undone,
I daren't leave the kids' toys
lying out there in the sun.
He'll
just go mad at me again,
I know he'll have his say,
there is never any pleasing him,
it goes on day by day.
His
dinner's on the table,
his paper's folded neat,
oh God, is that a cat's hair
I can see upon his seat.
My
life just isn't worth living,
he gives me such a fright.
Everything I do, to him,
will never turn out right.
Am
I really that bad at things,
does this house look such a mess
as he tells me that is does,
I can't tell, I must confess.
He's
shouting at me now,
he says his dinner's cold,
but it's steaming, I can see it,
the plate I can barely hold.
I
clean the mess from the floor
and as he storms out of the house,
he screams that I have missed a bit,
and that I'm a useless spouse.
Oh
God, don't let him back here,
I can hardly stand any more,
I don't know what he wants from me,
am I his wife or just his whore.
I
can't bear for him to touch me,
as he pleasures himself this way,
my head is screaming 'let me be',
I can't stand another day.
Let
me sleep and never wake,
this life I cannot stand,
when I made my vows, this ain't the way
my future I had planned.
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The
wind may howl, the rain may pour,
the snow lay thick on the ground
but here, within our cottage retreat,
our piece of heaven, we've found.
The
oaken door, so firm and stout,
closing out the world so cold,
here within our paradise fine
happiness we cannot withhold.
So
warm and safe within these walls
our love and dreams abound,
The dreamy nights are ours to share
soft and gentle as melodies sound,
Candlelight
flickers across the room
with the shadows to gently play,
dancing and flashing along the walls
keeping the darkness at bay.
The
log fire crackles, so bright and warm,
exploding fireflies into the glare
wisps of smoke up the chimney,
creep to seek out the cold night air.
And
we, snuggled close, upon the rug,
our arms and bodies entwined,
to languish in our love complete,
our hearts and souls combined.
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TIME
AND DISTANCE
This
warm and lovely feeling,
so deep inside me grows
with every time I talk to you,
my spirit simply glows.
The
gentle tone of your voice,
your accent soft and calm,
I long to be there by your side,
to languish in your arms.
Every
time, your voice I hear,
I mellow to the sound
feeling ever closer
then my heart begins to pound.
What
is this powerful spell
that you cast upon my soul,
It would seem my total life
is under your control.
I
willingly surrender
to this felicitatious dream
And hope reality, slender,
Will enter to this scheme,
But
time and distance 'tween us,
this union won't allow
One day, my dear, we shall meet
To you I make this vow.
Succumbing
to your tender charms,
praying no more to part,
I shall offer my open arms
So you receive my heart.
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How
many ways is it possible
to tell you 'I love you'
That it's everything about you
and everything you do
How
many ways can I let you know
within me, you start a fire
that burns so bright, you really are
my heart's one burning desire.
How
can I explain the way I feel
to let you understand,
that yearning that's deep inside me,
my love's at your command.
How
can I enlighten you,
of the craving that I perceive
that only your love given in return
is able to relieve.
How
can I tell you that from the first,
my passion was born then grew.
But I know for sure, I need not explain
'cause I know...you love me too.
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THE
LETTER
It
lay quite still upon the mat, it fluttered through
the door,
not wanting yet to touch it, as it lay there on the
floor.
I knew the words it contained, words so clear and
plain,
telling me my broken heart would still be full of
pain.
Pain
that I don't want to face, I fear what lay
ahead,
frightened just of touching it, I would open it
with dread.
We had argued, just last night, I gave you back
your ring,
you told me the affair was over, it had only been a
fling.
How
could you do it to me, and break my heart this
way,
you begged me to forgive you, no longer you would
stray.
How can I believe it won't recur, how can I trust
you now,
not to break my heart a second time, this I can't
allow.
For
I know that you still want her, and I am second
best,
No, I will not take you back, to again my heart
molest.
My life will take a back seat, and to you I'll not
pretend
to forgive the hurt you caused, and allow my heart
to mend.
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THE
DAY YOU DIED
Each
day I come to visit, as you lay so peaceful
there,
knowing that your soul's at rest, with freedom from
all care.
It makes no sense in this world, for it's here you
should have stayed,
that car headed straight for you, did it have to
end this way?
This
senseless slaughter of you, this destroyer of your
life,
you left, two weeks, before the day that I would be
your wife.
But now you're taken from me, they've put you in
your grave,
How is it that your precious life, they could not
help to save.
My
dress hangs in the wardrobe, for the day we should
have wed,
my heart filling with regret, as approaching that
day, I dread.
For we will not stand side by side, exchanging vows
of love,
instead you'll be looking down from heavenly skies
above.
My
love will always be true to you, from this day till
my end,
until that time, here by your grave, my whole life
I will spend.
But on that day, I'll make my vows, and sit here
bye your side,
knowing that forever more, I'll curse the day you
died.
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THE
COFFIN
The
coffin lay there so forboding,
I wanted to turn round and run
a steady hand to my shoulder placed
afore my blossoming fear had won.
The
pictures hung silent on the walls
a stillness clung to the air
the scent of death was all around
the fire grate lay cold and bare.
So
chilled, the room, in deathly hush,
feet shuffling across the floor,
were the only sounds that could be heard
morbid silence could not ignore.
A
gentle nudge to me from behind
urged me closer toward that casket
a great doubt formed within my mind
wanting to leave, but couldn't ask it
Slowly,
dutifully, edging close
to that ghoulish box of pine
pure white satin peeped o'er the edge
revealing its contents divine.
Opening
my eyes displayed to me
a serene angel so full of grace
so peacefully lying, her skin so pure,
no single hair fell from place
This
angel was my own sweet Mum
the creator of my whole,
her purpose upon this mortal earth
my life hers to extol
A
peaceful calm came over me
her lying there did I espy
my fingers crept up to her cheek
'I love you Mum, Goodbye'
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ALONE
As
I sit alone, I hear the cry
of a far off sea-bird, way up high.
The sky is blue, the day is clear.
No-one comes around, no-one comes near.
Alone
I stand, I walk the beach,
I try to find something out of reach,
The burden I carry, I carry alone,
pick and fondle a small round stone.
A
stone is lucky, it feels no pain,
It just is worn by wind and rain.
The birds are free and are so shy,
I just sit alone and cry.
No
where to hide, no where to run
My load is heavy, I see no sun
No one to love, I see no hope,
Through the years of life, I beg and
grope.
Maybe
one day, I hope to see
that life will turn out good for me.
For this I will always hope and pray,
that I may see the sun one day.
To
me, love will come, one day, it should
and see this loneliness gone, for good.
But until to me, that day is shown,
I'll sit and walk and cry, alone.
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20
YEARS AGO
Some
20 years ago, my Dear
when we were both still young,
we lived our lives as we thought best,
dreaming dreams as yet unsung.
Young
loves we had, we both agree,
that did not turn out right,
The tears that fell, the heartaches too.
The sadness of life's own plight.
So
much we have suffered along the way,
treading life's path with care,
Wishing and praying that time would mend
love's twisted course repair.
We
each have had our sorrows,
our heartaches and our pain,
the loves we've had through teenage years
that drove us both insane,
The
paths we've trod and things we've done,
some not without regret,
wasting many years on mistaken dreams
our futures seemed quite set,
Each
corner turned we would face
new challenges to our heart,
to tug upon the strings so fine
our submission to impart.
We
gave our all, and we fought on,
and to our vows stayed true,
But times do change, and new light brought
the signs of life anew.
I've
known you just a short time now,
but so clearly it does show
an appeasing life we would have known
had we met....20 years ago.
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PICTURES
ON THE WALL
Hanging
silently upon the wall
My life in pictures is revealed to all.
Frames full of memories for all to see,
But every one is so special to me.
The
face of a schoolgirl hanging there,
With sparkling eyes, long brown hair.
A time when teenage years were cast,
Remembering times long gone past.
Pictures
of my family and happy years,
Faces of sorrow, and crying of tears.
Pictures of my children each year they grew,
Placing each frame alongside the new.
On
the walls they hang, my memories to keep,
My life's journey in pictures and shall never
sleep.
A journey that keeps growing from picture to
frame,
No likeness displayed there, could be the
same.
A
story it relates, to those whom they see
Those pictures and frames tell the story of me,
In bedrooms lounge, from the door to the hall.
My life hangs in pictures upon my wall
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I
REMEMBER
How
often I sit here and ponder, on times long gone
past,
Things I've seen in my life, those memories there
to last.
I remember sitting by an open fire, no TV there to
see,
A radio was all that we had, my family and
me.
I
recall those summer days, spending time upon the
beach,
The hours of fun that we all had, till end of day
we reached.
I remember walks out in the forest where deer could
oft be seen,
Watching rabbits and finding footprints where once
a fox had been.
Those
frosty nights and frozen morns, to find on the
windowpane,
The icicles that hung there dripping, as they
melted once again.
Watching through the window, as a storm would pass
us by,
to see the blackened clouds, as they'd drift across
the sky.
I
remember the feel of calm when the wind outside had
died,
The fluffy clouds pure white and clean, on the
horizon there espied.
I remember the day I brought you home, my family
first to meet,
How you tripped and blushed so red, as you went to
take a seat.
That
day that you proposed to me, how clearly I
recall,
a joy that rose within my heart, as you stood proud
and tall.
I remember, on our wedding day, how much my mother
cried,
Happy tears coursed down her face, no makeup could
defy.
I
remember the day I told you, that parents we would
be,
The look of love upon your face, I still can
clearly see.
And on the day our son was born, you were there by
my side.
Your heart filled with such joy, your chest puffed
out with pride.
And
as he grew, first steps he took, a bike then
learned to ride,
The falls, grazed knees, and broken limbs, he took
all in his stride.
The day he went to college, still lives on in my
memory,
So grand he looked and I so proud, the world for
him to see.
I
remember the day the doctor called to say that you
were ill,
That only a short time we could expect to be
together still.
That day that we buried you, and lay you here to
rest,
Memories all came flooding back, I knew my life was
blessed.
So
many memories that I recall of happy times and
sad,
The things we've shared between us, of all the
times we've had.
By sitting here, and all alone, looking back into
the past,
Is the only way that I know to make those happy
memories last.
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