A GHOST IN THE NIGHT I heard you in a dream last night. You spoke to me so clearly. Your voice seemed friendly, soft and sweet. It was grand to feel you near me. But when I wake, of course, you're gone. And I know you won't be back. So far away and unreachable, you're the dearest thing I lack. I wish you didn't hate me so. I'll always yearn for you. Guess we must have crossed in another life, but I'm the only one who knew. The first time that I saw you, you cocked your head and smiled. But that was many, many years ago, and beyond far too many miles. We had the same eyes, green and old, though our youth belied the years. Age-old thoughts we must have shared, and many, many tears. My heart was yours from that very day. You held it in your hand. And I held yours for just a while in our Never, Never Land. But we were not to be, you and I. You belonged to someone else. So we laughed and loved and said goodbye. I put my heart back on the shelf. Twenty years went by, some slow, some fast, and there you were again. Not in the flesh but in my dream, sitting quietly, at the foot of my bed. "Get up," you said, "and come with me. You can't let go just yet. I'll wait for you, but not too long; we must make the most of what's left." It seemed so real. Your coat was red, your voice was clear and strong. Your words sang softly within my head. Maybe all hope was not yet gone. So I rose, somehow, I found the strength to get up one more time. Though when I did, you soon were gone. Am I finally losing my mind? "To the sea," I said, "to my wishing spot. That's where I need to go. To ask my sun god what to do for an aching heart. He'll know." "Go find him," I heard, though not in words. The waves brought the message to me. And with each splash, the dark and cold gave a hint of what still might be. "Good God," I thought, "what might I find? Will he hate me or even remember? I must take the chance, whatever the cost, I'll write to him in December." And so I did, and before too long, a letter from you I got. But no words of love or "welcome back." None of that mushy rot. Soon the time came when my wish came true. I saw you in the flesh. Your dark hair now no longer brown, but those green eyes, still sweet and fresh. My heart for so long had been still and weak. For years it had not sung a song. Maybe now, at last, it might come back to life. My fears of gloom could be wrong. But I'm too late, I see. It's hard to swallow. The feelings you had once are gone. Though I still worship you, you've gotten over me. You regained your life and went on. My foolish heart played a trick on me, one last prank before it dies. "Way to go, old sport, at least I see by no earthly rules are you tied." So back in your box, my naive hopes. It was only a dream brought me here. A ghost in the night spoke my name, you see, and for a minute I saw through my tears. Maybe next time around, we'll get it right. Til then I'll go back to sleep. But an amputee still feels his legs, and you'll always be here with me. -- "Small Person" aka Nan Nichols   Top | Back to Ballad Poems | Back to Main Page